The First Big Lie – excerpt from my book

The First Big Lie – excerpt from my book

Below is a short excerpt from the intro of my new book – about living your dream life, or changing what you want to change in life. You can find it on links below the excerpt.


“From the day we start school, or in some cases maybe even earlier, we are told how to succeed in life. There is a whole system built around it. We learn that we have to study hard, get good grades, get into a good university, get good grades again, get a good job, advance in our career every now and then and save money for our retirement. We go on like this for maybe 40 years, as if we were on autopilot and then when we retire, we can finally do the things we love. We can finally relax a bit. We can finally enjoy life a bit more. If we are still with good health.

We think this is what we want. We think this is what we want. But is it really? Is it our own little voice in our head telling us this, our own internal compass that points us in this direction? Or is it everyone else’s voices or something that has been generally accepted as “truth” that tells us this?

To be honest, this was never a good plan and it is even worse now. Why? First of all, because people are different. We like different things, we think differently, we have different aspirations and talents. So, having the same plan as everyone else is not a good plan. It never was. Some people are good at working with their hands. Some are better with their heads. Some prefer routine work. They like to do more or less the same thing every day. Others need changes and challenges all the time. We are created to have different talents and to do different things, so why should we follow the same path? Why should we all follow the same standardized way of living our lives?

Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.”

Steve Jobs

Most people seem to have the kind of career that was expected from them. Something that they thought would please their parents, their friends or something that was generally appreciated in the society or social environment they live. They were made to believe it was right for them. It was the good thing. The right thing to do. Or, they simply valued other people’s opinion more than their own because they were never really taught how to think for themselves or listen to their own dreams and inclinations.

So, they do something that pays the bills. Something that they can stand. Not something they love. Some of them make just enough money. Because since they don’t love what they do, they don’t do it with passion and without passion, it is hard to put in that extra that makes the work stand out. Of course, if it doesn’t stand out, no one will pay that extra money. The money you would be worth if you did something with passion. Others somehow manage to put in that extra work, and make good money, despite not loving what they do. They advance fast in their careers and go fast forward, but unfortunately, they are going in the wrong direction.

I would guess around 80 % of all people don’t really enjoy their work. They don’t really like Mondays. They get bored just thinking about Mondays. Are you one of them?

To make matters worse, this plan is even worse now. Why? Because what would previously have been at least a safe job and a safe plan is not safe anymore. The world is now truly global. Markets for pretty much everything are global. Competition is tougher than ever. Companies charging forward on autopilot, doing things “the way we do things here” is a dangerous way forward then markets are global and competition is tougher than ever. So, some companies are bound to fail. Which means, if you work in a company that can’t handle that kind of competition, you might be without your job any day now.

In addition, technology changes fast. What was state of the art yesterday might become totally obsolete and useless tomorrow. So, some entire industries are bound to fail too. With them, a lot of people will lose their jobs. Most of their skills and what they know might be useless. So, on an individual level, mindlessly doing the same things every day doesn’t work in this world anymore.

What was considered safe is not safe anymore. You can never be sure to keep your job as long as you are employed by someone else. You can still fail even if you choose the traditionally relatively safe path, having a job that you might not even like. So, there is no safe bet anymore.

When there is no safe bet anymore, the smartest thing you can do is to follow your heart, listen to your feelings and to try to achieve your dreams. That is the only way to truly live. You follow your heart. You do something that you love. It will make you happier. Being happy doing what you love is the road to success.

Competition is tougher than ever because of the global markets. That is the downside. But this also means there are a million new possibilities. Your market is also global. The market for your specific skills is global too and you can sell it worldwide.

I always believed this, and I have repeated it to many friends over the years: If you love something, you will do it a lot. If you do it a lot, you will become good, and when you are good, you can make money from it. I know it is might not be easy, but it is possible.”


If you are curious about the other lies, or how to achieve the changes you want, you can get the book here:

🇧🇷 BRASIL Ebook
🇲🇽 MEXICO Pasta blanda
🇯🇵 JAPAN Paperback
🇮🇳 INDIA Ebook

Kristofer Mencák has a M.Sc. in Business Administration from Stockholm School of Economics. He is a consultant, author and lecturer on social media, viral marketing and word of mouth. He has also recently been travelling the world teaching the dance kizomba.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.